.. I’ve closed enough windows to know you can never look back..
Indeed, breaking up could be hard, especially if you’ve always thought the relationship was meant to be forever; more especially if you’ve given all you had to make it work and it eventually crumbled. It hurts most of all if you were knowingly or unknowingly and consciously or unconsciously USED.
CLOSURE! The first brave step to take towards moving on from a failed relationship is finding and gaining closure. Simply put, make peace with the past, your past. How?? Lift the lid! Talk about it with someone you are comfortable with and trust. You’ll be surprised at how soothing talking about and making peace with the past can be. However, if you find it very hard to talk about or you cant seem to find someone you trust to tell or you are not entirely comfortable telling someone else, just write about it.
There is something about making up that we’ve all failed to comprehend. We’ve all been blind to the fact that making up decreases value! Forget about the stale myth that making up heightens love and affection. If there were enough of those you wouldn’t have broken up in the first place. Dont ever forget you become cheap on recall and the easiest way to become someone’s pawn or puppet is running back to them after breaking up. The power shifts to their sole command as they are safe in the knowledge that you will always keep coming back to them. However, we sometimes dont know what we have until we lose it.
Just as you cant afford to look back if you really wanna move on, you cant equally afford to jump into a ‘bounce-back’ relationship. Bouncing back is fun, no doubt about it. However, the fun is always basically short lived. Just chill, stand aside and watch from the sidelines.
Avoiding bounce-backs brings me to my personal favourite, have fun, loads of it. Yes you are heartbroken, but no, you cant afford to be alone or moody. Get up, go out with friends, have maximum fun, party and this might be the best time to try out new things.
In the spirit of trying out new things, one of the best ways of moving on is rebranding. Be a new and different you; upgrade, add more value. Make it an habit of improving yourself after any breakup, it definitely makes for a new and better beginning.
Ironically, in the process of forgetting about the ugly past and moving on, never forget why you are moving on. Remember why you broke up and don’t forget to never make the same mistakes twice.
It might sound absurd saying you should be single when you are already single, but yeah, be consciously single. Be without attachments for a given stretch of time. Yeah we’ve all heard that the best way to get over someone is to get underneath or on top of another person, but as with most myths, it is erroneous. The best way to get over someone and effectively move on is to get a strong hold of yourself. This is when family and friends matter most. Afterall, you are all you’ve got.
No one is saying moving on is easy, but it is a pretty good yard stick to measure your strength and self-esteem. Every heart deserves its time to heal.
..we don’t chase, we replace..